Jewish single men, read it and weep: Sarah Silverman is off the market.
Jesus must have given Sarah a good pep talk during their recent hangout sesh (he appeared in Sarah’s kitchen to give her the truth about women’s reproductive rights — and stayed for a CSI marathon); Us Weekly reports that the Jewish comedian is dating actor Michael Sheen.
“They were making out at Soho House,” an eyewitness told Us. “They were all over each other for a lot of the night.”
Guess that’s what happens when you go to a birthday party celebrating the star of “Masters of Sex.” (Sheen plays Dr. William Masters.)
Silverman’s five-year relationship with Jimmy Kimmel ended in 2009. Sheen has been linked to VH1 “Morning Buzz” host Carrie Keagan and “Midnight in Paris” co-star Rachel McAdams since his split with Kate Beckinsale in 2003. The two were married for 8 years and have a 14-year-old daughter, Lily.
Per a very credible “insider”: “Sarah and Michael came and left together. She drove,” an insider tells Us. “When they left, Sarah opened her trunk so Michael could put all of his gifts in and then they drove away.”
Now, for the real question: If they get married, will he pull a Benjamin Millepied and join the tribe? Fingers crossed.
Photo credit: HBO/Janet Van Hamm
Guess who Sarah Silverman hung out with last night?
A nice Jewish boy named Jesus Christ. Yes, that Jesus.
It seems that Jesus is a little upset about how his name is being used in the national discussion about women’s reproductive rights (or “intolerance and oppression,” as Silverman puts it), and wants Sarah to spread his message.
In a new video released on her Youtube channel,” Silverman, wearing a t-shirt that literally screams “Feminist,” remembers her night with Jesus — ending with a cozy session on the couch watching “NCIS.”
Oh, and they also talked about the mystery of life, and at what point life actually begins.
“At 40!” Jesus laughed. “Fertilized eggs aren’t people, people are people.”
Wait, there’s more: “But people who believe fertilized eggs are people are people too. You have to love them. You’re not better than them.”
Wise words. Jesus is pretty convincing.
But don’t worry guys, Sarah isn’t going anywhere (even if she did wear a cross that one time). The segment ends with Jesus massaging her back (!), cooing“That’s a good Jewish girl!”
Check it out:
For Jews, Christmas is a time to switch off, relax, be first in line to see the Christmas blockbuster releases and eat Chinese food by the soft glow of the TV. And in this case, celebrities really are just like us — how did your favorite Jewish stars celebrate Christmas? Find out:
Sarah Silverman sent good wishes.
Happy Birthday, Jesus! I'm sorry u were murdered by people afraid of new ideas! XOXOampmdash; Sarah Silverman (@SarahKSilverman) December 25, 2013
Seth Rogen binged on TV.
Watched so many movies! Loved: Enough Said, The To Do List, Wolf of Wall Street. Also loved the 35 eps of Law and Order SVU I watched.ampmdash; Seth Rogen (@Sethrogen) December 26, 2013
Elizabeth Banks enjoyed winter views.
Hope it was merry and bright. Before après, it was bright and during it was merry. Now I'm sleepy. pic.twitter.com/D4lPe2ewHyampmdash; Elizabeth Banks (@ElizabethBanks) December 26, 2013
Lou Reed, rock & roll poet and founding member of the Velvet Underground, died on the same Sunday morning that he taught us all to love (“Sunday Morning.” 1966). As usual, Twitter was the first to know it. Here is how Jewish celebrities reacted:
The one and only Lou Reed, died today at 71.ampmdash; Bette Midler (@BetteMidler) October 27, 2013
Just a perfect day you made me forget myself I thought I was someone else, someone good #RIP LOU REEDampmdash; Sarah Silverman (@SarahKSilverman) October 27, 2013
We love you Lou. We love you Laurie.ampmdash; Lena Dunham (@lenadunham) October 27, 2013
Lou Reed forever defined the beautifully blue Sunday morning. It feels like a wry touch to hear the sad news about him at such a time.ampmdash; B.J. Novak (@bjnovak) October 27, 2013
I think I read that Eno said The Velvet Underground never had a big hit, but everyone who heard them went out and started a band. #LouReedampmdash; Joseph Gordon-Levitt (@hitRECordJoe) October 27, 2013
Oh it’s such an imperfect day. #LouReedRIPampmdash; Stephen Fry (@stephenfry) October 27, 2013
Linger on…ampmdash; Evan Rachel Wood (@evanrachelwood) October 27, 2013
If you have a spare 24 minutes at some point today, you can fill them by watching a newly released failed NBC pilot, courtesy of Sarah Silverman.
“Susan 313,” which stars Silverman along with Jeff Goldblum, Tig Notaro, June Diane Raphael (“Burning Love”) and “Parks and Recreation” writer Harris Wittels, never made on the air. It tells the story of Susan (Silverman), who moves into her old apartment building after breaking up with her boyfriend of 10 years.
Silverman tweeted an announcement introducing the pilot to the world earlier today:
LADIES & GERMS, I GIVE YOU FAILED NBC SIT-DRAM "SUSAN 313" http://t.co/sal7Edhk5Fampmdash; Sarah Silverman (@SarahKSilverman) October 22, 2013
But the comedian was quick to point out that this isn’t some kind of bitter revenge post: “This isn’t like, ‘Can you believe they didn’t pick this up?’ This isn’t that kind of posting. It’s like, ‘They probably did the right thing, but we liked the show,’” Silverman explains in the episode’s intro. “So enjoy it.”
Did NBC do the right thing? Check out the episode and let us know in the comments!
Last week, Sarah Silverman made an appearance on comedian W. Kamau Bell’s talk show, “Totally Biased.”
As usual, she was wonderful. But in between quips about the James Franco roast, and how she is actually genuinely hurt by jokes about her age, one couldn’t help but zoom in on the very unusual piece of jewelry hanging by a delicate chain around her neck (especially after Heeb posted an enlarged version of it).
Why is Sarah Silverman wearing a crucifix?
Maybe she’s just reminding us that “Jesus is Magic.”. After, she did launch the conversation with a reminder that as a Jew, she has tribal approval to tell Jew jokes.
Come on, Sarah, don’t leave us — we need you.
Like most of us, the perfect night for Jewish comedian Sarah Silverman consists of one alone— and in flannels.
The self deprecating celebrity conveyed her idea of an awesome night in her new music video, “Perfect Night,” which is part of YouTube’s Comedy Week that kicked off this past Sunday.
In a perfectly auto-tuned voice that sounds like a more nasal Britney Spears, Silverman hilariously deadpans lines like, “tonight is the night, I’m gonna celebrate, stay at home order in, watch a movie, then masturbate.”
Black Eye Peas star Will.i.am pops in throughout the video via Skype to note Silverman’s expertise in “rocking them sweatpants,” “shaving them armpits,” and selecting a film of choice on Netflix (which is a Holocaust documentary, by the way).
She eventually retires to bed for a screening of a bizarre porno, but not before drinking coconut water and lathering in coconut butter.
Barbara Walters looked straight into the camera while filming a recent episode of “The View” (that is, once she figured out which camera to look at) and plain out told her old friend Donald Trump that he is being “a fool.” If that wasn’t clear enough, she admonished the tycoon and reality TV star with, “Stop it! Get off it!” in regard to the birther conspiracy theory accusations Trump continues to level at President Obama.
Adam Sandler is apparently big in Romania. Well, at the very least his animated feature, “Hotel Transylvania” has been well received there. Sandler didn’t make it over to Transylvania for the film’s premiere there, but director Genndy Tartakovsky did. Next up for Sandler is a Western titled, “Ridiculous 6.”
Drew Barrymore and hubby Will Kopelman made their first public appearance since their baby daughter Olive was born at the LACMA 2012 Art + Film Gala presented by Gucci on Saturday. The couple was photographed showing off pics on an iPhone to friends Jennifer Aniston and her fiancé Justin Theroux. Judging from the adoring looks, we think it’s safe to bet they were the latest photos of little Olive.
Sunday’s Emmys were a font of Shmooze celebrity news. First off, Mayim Bialik made Jewish moms and dads everywhere kvell at the awards ceremony on Sunday night when she gave a shout out during a red carpet interview to popular parenting blog, Kveller.com.
Did you notice that “Two Broke Girls” star Kat Dennings was slouching all evening at the Emmys? Apparently, it was to ensure that her ample bosom did not pop out of her über-low-cut stunning scarlet strapless gown. “No matter what I do they’re there, so…,” the actress joshed. Denning’s date, boyfriend Nick Zano’s main assignment was to prevent a wardrobe malfunction. “He has been alerted to the possibility of emergency and he’s always primed and ready,” she said.
Gideon Raff, the original creator of the Israeli series “Hatufim,” on which Showtime’s “Homeland” is based, was on hand to receive the Emmy for the best writing in a drama series. He accepted it along with Alex Ganza and Howard Gordon, the American show’s executive producers.
In her acceptance speech for the award for outstanding actress in a drama series, Claire Danes showed off her guttural pronunciation skills as she acknowledged her co-star Mandy Patinkin. “Challah!” she exclaimed after mentioning Patinkin’s name. Was this some inside joke? Or maybe a reference to the round variety of the traditional Jewish bread we eat on the High Holidays? Speculation abounded on Twitter.
In other news, the Jewish Council for Education and Research’s “Let My People Vote” video ad starring the Sarah Silverman has quickly topped the political charts.
Mila Kunis and Ashton Kutcher’s PDA fest continued this past weekend. The pair were spotted canoodling in various spots around the Big Apple.
Israel is expecting visits from Chuck Norris, who accepted an invitation from Likud MK Danny Danon, as well as from RedFoo (the guy with the big hair and oversized glasses) of the recently broken-up LMFAO.
Full frontal? No prob. Max Greenfield, who plays Schmidt on “New Girl,” says he’s ready and willing to portray Christian Grey in the upcoming film version of “Fifty Shades of Grey.”
In sad news, it was announced that Bonnie Franklin has been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. Gen Xers, in particular, will recall that Franklin, 68, played mom to Valerie Bertinelli and Mackenzie Phillips’ teenage characters on the “One Day At A Time” sitcom from 1975 to 1984.
Finally, as the Day of Atonement descends upon us, Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu and President Shimon Peres are making a conciliatory gesture…at least for Kol Nidrei. The two will pray together on Erev Yom Kippur at a Jerusalem synagogue close to the President’s official residence.
Pixie-coiffed Anne Hathaway accompanied her fiancé Adam Shulman to Rosh Hashanah services on Monday. The paparazzi documented a lot of PDA on the couple’s way to IKAR at the Westside JCC in Los Angeles.
Hathaway and Shulman weren’t the only ones doing some New Year’s smooching. Mila Kunis and Ashton Kutcher were spotted locking lips in New York’s Central Park, also on Monday.
Another celeb couple caught by the paparazzi used the moment to do some guerilla marketing for charities close to their hearts. Upon leaving a restaurant at which they had lunched, Andrew Garfield and his girlfriend Emma Stone held up signs with a message drawing attention to organizations they feel deserve more attention than they do.
Amanda Bynes is out of jail on her own recognizance for her April DUI arrest, but she is in a lot of trouble for a number of serious driving offences. A judge, who denied a DA’s request that a $50,000 bail be imposed on Bynes, has warned her there will be severe consequences if she breaks the law again. The actress’s parents have moved from Texas to Southern California to keep an eye on her.
“Glee” star Lea Michele is the new face of French cosmetic company L’Oreal.
When Sarah Silverman wants to get rid of her gum while walking the red carpet, she just takes it out of her mouth and hands it to the nearest guy. On Tuesday night at the “Condé Nast Travelers” “Visionaries” awards, that just happened to be Adrian Grenier—who tactfully put it in his suit pocket.
“The Big Bang” cast graces the cover of this week’s Entertainment Weekly. But where’s Mayim Bialik?!
On Sunday, Ryan Braun drew a standing ovation as he hit his 200th career home run, but the Mets still lost 3-0 to the Brewers.
According to Forbes’ newly released annual list of the 400 wealthiest individuals in the U.S., New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg is $3 billion richer now than he was just half a year ago.
There’s a new young Jewish would-be singing star to cheer for. Thirteen-year-old Carly Rose Sonenclar of Westchester, N.Y. wowed the judges at her The X-Factor audition with her rendition of Nina Simone’s “Feeling Good” and advanced to the next round.
A pair of Jewish comedians are going the extra smile for the father of a friend.
Sarah Silverman and Adam Sandler are both endorsing Supersmile, a tooth-whitening product invented by dentist Irwin Smigel, whose website proclaims him “the father of aesthetic dentistry.” The pair provided testimonials in keeping with their comic styles, with Sandler claiming his teeth “were starting to look like cheese doodles” before he began using the product, and Silverman declaring, “Holy crap, my teeth are definitely whiter!”
The well-connected Dr. Smigel has an impressive roster of famous endorsers: others include Jimmy Fallon, Ivana Trump and Kelly Ripa.
The Shmooze is surprised but pleased to learn that author, TV star and famed bedwetter Sarah Silverman will star in a new comedy on NBC.
The subject of an “intense bidding war” among several networks, the show will be loosely based on Silverman’s own life — as was her previous show for Comedy Central, “The Sarah Silverman Program.”
The new series, which will be co-written by Silverman and two collaborators from that earlier show, will likely be read as a take on her relationship with Jimmy Kimmel, the late-night TV host she dated for years. The unnamed new series will follow Silverman as her character rebounds from a decade-long relationship. Based on her previous TV show, stand-up routines and political activism, the Shmooze expects lots of Jewish content on the new show.
The bigger question is how Silverman will translate her controversial comic style to network television, which is tame compared to many of her racially and sexually charged past routines. But we have high hopes, and look forward to seeing what Silverman comes up with.
These days, all you need is a little chutzpah and some social networking to make your dreams come true. At least, that is all American-Israeli Molly Livingstone needed to achieve her goal of meeting Sarah Silverman on the comedienne’s first trip to Israel.
The 28-year-old Los Angeles native, who lives in Jerusalem and does improvisational and sketch comedy with the HaHafuch troupe, has long admired Silverman. “I’ve been a fan of Sarah Silverman since I first found out about her. She’s a successful Jewish-American woman comedian and, and that’s something special. I am fascinated by her. She pushes all the buttons and is a very smart person,” Livingstone said.
So, Livingstone wrote a post on her blog, The Big Felafel, titled “Be My BFF Campaign: Sarah Silverman Be My Friend,” in which she comically declared her admiration for Silverman and listed several compelling reasons why the performer should agree to meet her. First on the list: “We are both Jewish (I only use this as a reason, because people think when they are setting people up, as long as they have one thing in common, like age, race or religion, that they must be perfect for each other…just trying to cover my bases. And this is kind of like the perfect shidduch).”
Pop star Shakira is on her way to Jerusalem — not to perform, but to speak about childhood education at a summit organized by Israeli President Shimon Peres.
The “Hips Don’t Lie” singer will participate in the Israeli Presidential Conference this month with an eclectic set of guests, who range from Dr. Ruth and Sarah Silverman to Nobel Prize winners Israel Aumann and Eric Maskin.
A goodwill ambassador for UNICEF, the Colombian singer has family ties to the region: she was born Shakira Isabel Mebarak Ripoll, and comes partly from Lebanese Christian roots. She has regularly incorporated Middle Eastern sounds and even a bit of Arabic into her performances, and she knows a thing or two about belly dancing. Shakira has made childhood education a focus of her charity, the Barefoot Foundation.
Two weeks ago New York Magazine was hobnobbing with Los Angeles’ finest at the launch of Rainn Wilson’s (of “The Office” fame) spiritual new book, “Soul Pancake.” Among those who came out to support Wilson’s literary endeavors, including jugglers, musicians, and famous faces from “The Office,” was actress and comedian Sarah Silverman.
New York Magazine took the opportunity to ask Silverman about her nude scene in the upcoming film, “Take This Waltz.” Turns out Silverman’s mother isn’t the only one disappointed that her daughter is stripping down for all to see. The Jewish girl next door told the magazine that if men were excited by the news, they had better temper their expectations, warning, “they are setting themselves up for major disappointment.”
Last night, Judd Apatow debuted his tribute video at a benefit for the American Jewish World Service at Jazz at Lincoln Center.
First, a message flashes on screen: “A Public Service Announcement not approved by American Jewish World Service.” Then Don Johnson appears with perfectly coiffed hair and stubble, and says, “I’m Don Johnson, and I’m not Jewish.” Next we have Danny Trejo in a black shirt, black jacket and gleaming silver cross: “I’m Danny Trejo, and I’m not Jewish.” “Wanna hear a secret?” Tracy Morgan asks, leaning into the camera. “I’m not Jewish.”
“Okay fine, I’m Jewish, you got me,” Jerry Seinfeld says. “What gave it away? Seinfeld?”
And so begins over three minutes of satisfying riffs and self-deprecation in a clever effort to promote AJWS’s cause. The star-studded lineup also features Lindsay Lohan, Gilbert Gottfried, Sarah Silverman, Ben Stiller, Susan Sarandon, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Dr. Ken and more.
Fundraising events for Jewish non-profits don’t usually turn out to be laugh riots. But tonight’s American Jewish World Service (AJWS) benefit at Jazz at Lincoln Center should have the audience rolling in the aisles. No, president Ruth Messinger’s not doing her banana-peel shtick; director Judd Apatow (“Knocked Up,” “Superbad”) will premiere a celebrity-studded tribute video that the NY Daily News calls “so funny benefit-goers are in danger of choking on their rubber chicken.”
The video will celebrate the 25th anniversary of the international aid organization and Messinger’s 70th birthday.
Among the famous faces Apatow roped into performing onscreen is professional provocateur Sarah Silverman, who, in the video, notes that the AJWS’s $22 million in grants to 34 countries “throws a wrench in the ‘Jews are cheap’ premise. I mean, if you think that’s cheap, there’s no way you’re Asian, because you’re really bad at math,” the News reports. According to ContactMusic.com, “Greenberg” actor Ben Stiller suggests that AJWS re-brand itself as “JAWS”: “You can have JAWS Week (on the Discovery Channel, but instead of Shark Week), it’s all just Jews.”
Another magazine bites the dust.
This time it’s Heeb, which announced today that it will move to an online-only format.
In a statement on its website titled “So Much for Controlling the Media,” Heeb’s publisher and editor-in-chief, Joshua Neuman, wrote:
I have some good news and some bad news.
The good news is that Heebmagazine.com will continue to provide trenchant analysis of world events, cultural critique of all that is Jewish and Goyish and countless photos of scantily-clad Israeli models. …
The bad news is that we are suspending the print edition of Heeb Magazine.
Heeb was launched in 2001 by Jennifer Bleyer. Its covers have featured comedian Sarah Silverman posing nude behind a sheet with a hole in it, Roseanne Barr dressed as Hitler baking “Jew” cookies, and Jonah Hill putting KY Jelly on his morning bagel.
Looks like there will be no follow up to “Wowshwitz,” this year’s season finale of “The Sarah Silverman Program,” which just got axed from Comedy Central.