The Shmooze

Andi Dorfman Is Really Over 'Bachelorette' Runner-Up

By Anne Cohen

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Unless you’ve been offline all day, or, you know, have a life beyond the dramatic ups and down of reality television, you may have heard that Andi Dorfman, a.k.a. the Jewish Bachelorette, has made her decision.

The lucky man comes in the form of Josh Murray, a failed baseball player from Atlanta. So basically, Dorfman could have avoided all this hearttache by just trolling her hometown’s sports bars.

But as in every fairy tale ending, there’s a big loser sitting at home crying. And in Andi’s case, that person is Nick Viall, who, as Jezebel pointed out, was less than gracious about not being the chosen one.

Since the show’s main action actually took place weeks ago, despite airing Monday on ABC, our main characters (sorry — of course, they’re real people with un-staged emotions) have had time to move on with their lives. But apparently, some haven’t quite gotten around to that.

According to US Weekly, Andi is mad at Nick for a comment he made on the “After the Final Rose” special, which aired after the Monday finale.

“If you weren’t in love with me, I’m just not sure why, like, why you made love with me,” Nick said. Dorfman, visibly just wanting this interaction to be over and done with, responded with a cool double entendre: “That’s kinda below the belt.”

“I think everyone is probably in agreement that it probably wasn’t the most tasteful route that Nick chose to go “After the Final Rose,” Andi admitted afterwards.”But it doesn’t negate the relationship that I had with him.”

Fiance Josh also had something to say about it: Yeah, to be honest, it was very classless and disrespectful,” he told US. “It just shows the type of person that he really is. I don’t associate myself with those kind of people and neither does Andi. So it’s nice that that’s over with and no concern to us or our lives.”

On Tuesday, US Weekly released the full text of a letter Nick sent to Andi via “Bachelorette” host Chris Harrison.

Grab some tissues. It’s a tear-jerker:

Andi,

You lit me up. You made me feel those things that people go a lifetime to find, and I feel like I made you feel the same. I truly hoped we would have made it into the real world, where there would be no arbitrary dead-line, where those stresses that came with that environment would have melted away, where we could have had the goofy, fun, exciting relationship that I know we could have. What we had was real to me, and it was amazing.

I fully realize that in the end I could have been wrong about what we had. While it’s hard to accept, I totally realize that it’s a possibility. With that being said, when I think about the relationship that we had, very few things in my life have felt more real.

think about that moment when you ended things and what you said to me. I believe you when you said something didn’t feel right with us when you woke up that morning, but I wonder if what didn’t feel right was really about us and our relationship. I wonder if it would have been different if that night you thought about us with your heart and not with your head. Let’s just call it what it was–our relationship was very much the road less traveled. I totally get that all the passion, intensity, and connections that we had were accompanied by fear and sometimes discomfort. There is a reason why very few are willing to take the road less traveled. It can be scary, challenging, and risky, but if you have the courage to take it, it usually ends up being amazing.

That is one thing that has bothered me the most–when you said you know you could have a good life with me, you just don’t think you could have a great one. The thing is, if you were to go back and think of every moment that we spent together, the first time we met, our first date, our “wow” moment in New England, our time in France, everything about Venice, our walk in Belgium, that moment in the monastery, the first time I told you I loved you and everything about that day and night, and the adjectives to describe those moments, many words come to mind. Words like exciting, passionate, intense, tingling, romantic, sexy, easy, and great. You could even say scary, nerve-racking, frustrating, and challenging. You could say all of these are words you could use to describe us, but I doubt very much you would think of those moments and the word “good” would ever come to mind.

I am not going to say that if by some miracle you changed your mind and were willing to give us a shot that we would definitely make it. I don’t know that. I think that if we were willing to trust each other, be totally vulnerable with one another, and follow our hearts, we would have a great chance. What I could promise you is that if we did make it, we would be anything but good. It would be exciting, sometimes even hard, but definitely great.

There is a reason why I asked you if you ever had your heart broken. I wanted to know if you have ever “put it on the line” enough to truly have a chance at something special. To me that is what it’s all about. A lot of things about us scared me. I really didn’t know if we would make it, but I was willing to put it all on the line for us because I truly believed the connection we had was incredibly unique and special. To me, if there is no risk of being totally crushed and heartbroken then there is no way it can be great.

I realize I have to move on and I mean it when I say that if you’re truly happy with your decision and I haven’t been a thought on your mind, then I want that happiness to continue for you. If I have to move on, I will look to find amazing with someone else know that some day I will. I just know I would much rather turn my life upside down and risk it all to have amazing with you.


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