The Shmooze

Palin's Apocalypse Hastened by Jewish Settlements

By Allison Gaudet Yarrow

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The Discovery channel is poised to scoop up a reality series starring Sarah Palin at home in Alaska, to be based on the 1970 fundamentalist text “The Late, Great Planet Earth,” which foretells the end of time. (Before the world ends, Palin will reportedly receive $1 million per episode.)

More horrifying than the prospect of trailing Palin in her native land is bespectacled literary blogger Maud Newton’s convincing postulation on The Awl laying out what could be Palin’s sinister master plan, the crux of which is, yes, the Jews.

The now-citified Newton owns up to a “tongues-speaking, faith-healing, demon-battling storefront church childhood,” not dissimilar from whence Palin came. She points to the Barbra Walters interview in which Palin, in flagrant opposition to the Obama administration’s position, practically chants “settle, baby, settle!” to Jews in Israel.

I believe that the Jewish settlements should be allowed to be expanded upon, because that population of Israel is, is going to grow. More and more Jewish people will be flocking to Israel in the days and weeks and months ahead. And I don’t think that the Obama administration has any right to tell Israel that the Jewish settlements cannot expand.

Newton writes that Palin encourages settlements in Israel because she believes Jews will flock there in advance of the apocalypse, as predicted by “The Late Great Planet Earth.” It’s frightening enough that she believes this, but Newtown points to an estimate that between 50 and 60 million Americans agree.


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